Most moms I know often feel like they are drowning in chaos. Managing the household tasks, managing kids’ activities, attempting to balance more things than we can carry. Mamas, we are uniquely made for our job, but we allow the Enemy to convince us otherwise.
Square pegs and round holes
The comparison trap often defeats us before we even get started. It is also based on a lie. Every person is unique. Every family. Every mom. Every child. If you attempt to do something that isn’t within your talent, learning style, ability, or comfort, you will be less likely to succeed. Your mindset in approaching obstacles matters as well. Instead of comparing yourself and your kids to someone else that you perceive to be better, focus on finding and over-using your talents. Your child may be artistic and not athletic. We don’t expect a fish to fly like a bird. Nurture the talents as they develop. Find opportunities to use them. Honor the gifts you see in your home.
Nearly every moment of every day, we have the opportunity to give something to someone else: Our time, our love, our resources.
S. Truett Cathy (Founder of Chick-Fil-A)
Turn Obstacles into Opportunities
I’ve yet to have a completely perfect day. Even on not perfect days, even on the really difficult days, I still want to be grateful. I want to find the good things, the moments that will become great memories. Some days, that is a more challenging task than others. I work for a positive mindset. On the days where it’s hard, when we’re in a funk or having an “off” day, those are the days that mindset matters most. Life isn’t fair. Interruptions happen. Chaos, in various levels and forms, erupts. These incidences are not coincidental. Every obstacle is an opportunity to learn. Every challenge is meant to change you for the better.
The reason a lot of people do not recognize opportunity is because it usually goes around wearing overalls looking like hard work.
Taming the Monster
I want to be a calm mother. One that speaks sweetly, never resorting to yelling. I want a peaceful home where children listen and obey and rewards are the only consequences. That is not my reality. Yet… I think the responsibility for some of my difficulties stops with me. We teach people how to treat us by what behavior we allow to continue. By giving multiple chances, we teach our children that they don’t have to listen until we are good and mad about it. Changing this habit is not an overnight success. I also believe most parents have the same goals and desires but we all have different approaches. What matters is being consistent in creating habits to produce positive outcomes.
It is our choices that show what we truly are far more than our abilities.
Albus Dumbledore (in Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets)
I desire a peaceful home, one where the only chaos is the messes we make while learning. This is a constant work in progress for me, but know this, mama, we don’t have to do it alone. One of the reasons I write is to share stories, in hopes that they may connect with someone else. If this has been helpful to you, I’d love for you to also share it with others.