Too Soon or Not Soon Enough
Posted On May 27, 2015
“Soon, but not soon enough.” Dietrich heard this a few weeks ago on the Disney channel and says it to every “Soon” answer he is given now. We finally have a delivery day for our household goods. “Soon, but not soon enough,” we can begin the business of settling into our new home and community. “Soon, but not soon enough,” we will learn how to be a civilian family and just be together again. “Soon, but not soon enough,” we will find the rhythm and melody that works for our family and dance (figuratively, for the most part) in joyous celebration.
Dietrich tends to worry, often about things that are either not real (concerns about Mario or his TV show characters) or will not likely happen. These become obsessions, which he repeats over and over until he is given an answer that satisfies him. He might be like his mom and have an overactive imagination. I know, though, that too soon, he will be too grown up to seek our comfort. Soon, the monsters he faces will not be the kind mommy and daddy can fight. Dietrich already acts like he’s an adult, in the way he talks and tries to be the boss. I’d like to keep him grounded in childhood for at least a few more years.
Madilynn is even more strong-willed. Everything is “I try that” or “Madi’s” and telling her no doesn’t go over well (though we do not back down). Soon, she will have more success in all she tries. Soon, she will need less help and be as independent as her big brother. Right now, she’s picking up only on his negative examples making the job of parenting twice as difficult.
Throughout this time of transition, the stress seems to outweigh everything else. Negativity is easier to focus on in the moment, which makes the days so much harder than they need to be. Yet we have much to be thankful for and many more positive things that have happened during this transition. The kids are both growing, both physically (evidenced by how many items of clothing we brought that they have outgrown) and intellectually (more easily recognized in Madilynn’s increasing verbal skills). We are blessed with a generous support system, a family that goes above and beyond to ease the burden of transition in any way possible. Dietrich is usually a big help. He’s learned how to make tacos while we’ve been here. He continues to assist with the laundry. Sometimes he even asks to help with bigger tasks, like putting sheets on the beds or cleaning the bathroom. Madilynn also likes to help, but her help often is more like an “undo” button. Still, she is learning.
Everything can be a lesson for life. We have limited time to teach some of these lessons. Soon, too soon, they will have other influences. What we do with our time now matters because it shapes the path that they will choose later.